We often ask Why?? (Job ch 1-3)

I read the first 3 chapters of Job last night...I want to kinda explore Job deeper but I am notorious for starting things and never completing them...so anyway, I was reading last night and it has been on my mind strong ever since...
Job had no idea about the conversation that had went on between God and satan...he had no idea why...in chapter 3, he even regretted being born...and he had no idea why he was having all the hardships...that just kept coming in waves...
That is what I am feeling right now...waves and waves of confusion, difficulty, troubles, worries...in the past 7 months, my life has done basically a 180 degree turn...nothing is the same as it was...except my job..and I don't know how long that will be the same...you know those stressor scales? I'm off the charts...LOL
So, what if, there was a conversation that went on in Heaven that I am not aware of....?
God had so much faith that Job wouldn't turn his back on Him and that he would endure....!
WOW! What if....What if God knows I am strong enough to endure all these waves of trials and gave satan permission to try me...? Not that I am anywhere near perfect like Job was...I mean, God gave satan permission to do anything he wanted to him except take his life...and we all agree that satan knows our weaknesses as well as Jesus does...so he[satan] knows just what will get us to deny God...What if he [satan] is trying to see if we will deny God, or quit on God?
Then another thing stuck out to me...Job lost his family...10 kids all in one day...I cannot even begin to imagine how this affected him...and obviously they were a close family, according to scripture... If someone came to me and told me I had lost my possessions, I would have a hard time dealing...but to loose my children too?? I would definitly regret the day I was born and wish I were dead and maybe even follow thru with some ideations....esp since right now, I feel like my kids are all I have...so we don't really understand how Job felt...to loose everything all in one day...and look what he did...
Job 1:20-22
²⁰Then Job arose, and rent his mantle, and shaved his head, and fell down upon the ground, and worshipped, ²¹And said, Naked came I out of my mother's womb, and naked shall I return thither: the LORD gave, and the LORD hath taken away; blessed be the name of the LORD. ²²In all this Job sinned not, nor charged God foolishly.

I have questioned God...I have said, How much longer do I have to go thru this? I have begged God over and over to take it from me...and Job did nothing but fell on the ground and worshipped...have I worshipped God over what is happening in my life right now? no, not really...I have thanked him for letting me see and come to the knowledge of so many things...but worshipped him? no...
I hope this makes you think as much as it has me...