Psalms 61;2b

When my heart is overwhelmed, lead me to the rock that is higher than I

Monday, September 11, 2006

Today...5 years ago

Today....5 years ago... I was working and not really focusing on the tasks at hand when I called CVS. ( I was working at Dr. V's office in town.) Cassandra asked me if I had heard, to which I replied, no. When she proceeded to tell me, it wasn't a big lifechanger. But as the second plane hit, I got a sick feeling. I remember hearing the news throughout the morning and hearing of fires here and planes there in different parts of the U.S., and I felt usafe. I wanted to be home. What was Morgan feeling. She had not long ago started kindergarten. I needed her here with me so I could protect her. Lukas was home with mamaw Chris. What was this wierd feeling of wanting the safety of my home walls? Later I heard, on Paul Harvey, that this is a feeling of "homing" I think is what he called it. Even later, songs were published about the feeling. At least I was normal for once. When I got home that afternoon, I was so relieved to see Morgan, but very upset when I learned that Tim had taken Lukas to Walmart with him. Didn't he know how bad I had wanted to wrap my kids in my arms and hold them and promise them that nothing could ever hurt them??

That evening, Mom and Dad came to watch a video that my uncle had taped of the first few hours of television coverage, since we were all at work, we hadn't saw much of the actual happenings. I didn't sleep well that night...

I never shed visual tears, but my heart cried many times during that time and has cried many times since then... in fear of a nation who has left God.

So today, as I look back, I want to remember the love I felt for my fellow americans after the fact. On that day, we all shared a common bond... our hearts were aching... our minds were scared. I want to remember how I prayed to God and heard the whole nation praying also. Never in all my years, had I heard praying and prayer mentioned so much. I want to remember to Thank GOD everyday for my freedom and safety. I also question alot as I look back. Where did all those feelings go? Why did I get upset at the redlight this morning and blow several times? We all slip away from God and the reality that we need him to get us thru each day.

No comments: